Joyfull Living

This week my life as a mom is a bit stressful.  We will hit a few monumental moments all in one week. Saturday will be the first wedding in the family as my oldest son will be getting married.  I've spent lots of time and posting on that, so I'll share the other big thing...this week our youngest son will turn 13...another teenager in the house!! Since there is a bit of a space between the youngest and his two older brothers, he's watched them for years as teenagers and can not wait to be one!   Things are a lot different with a teenager this time around for us.  Facebook, cell phones, email accounts are a brand new world for teenager today.  For a Christian family we should recognize the benefits of these, but also be aware of the dangers that they may hold.  A 13 year old given unlimited access to so many freedoms at one time can be overwhelming.  So...some guidelines need to be in place. A recent article read shared some fantast...

The past few weeks I’ve been hanging out with the girls….the teenage girls!!  There have been several summer youth (teenage) activities which my youngest son has been involved in and have needed chaperones! One night was spent 'getting beautiful’ complete with make up tips, cleaning tips and a lesson on true beauty that comes from walking with the Lord. Another lesson focused on serving one another.  Jesus gave the example of washing one another’s feet and we spent time doing just that! It is so important for young (and older) girls to know where true beauty comes from. True beauty has nothing to do with what we wear, how our hair looks or our make up.  While there is nothing wrong with Christian women wanting to look nice, each woman must examine her own motives. Today’s world places great emphasis on beauty – exceptionally perfect women stare at us from magazine covers every time we visit the grocery store. Christian women, while they can dress nicely and ...

In my early years of parenting, I read some advice that I put into practice.  It went along the lines of when young children were being disciplined for disobedience that the children must understand what they did wrong and a thorough discussion must be given for them to understand what they did wrong and to avoid the same mistakes in the future.  I found out that this one area was one I could do well!!  Talk and explain so they could understand what they did wrong?? Yep!  I nailed it!  And I continued this tradition for many years.  Through toddlers, pre-school, school age we talked things over. I found pre-teens and teenagers seemed to need a little more attention  and the issues got a bit more complicated, so I explained in detail....even more!  And to make sure they understood, it would be sit down, look eye to eye and they were expected to graciously receive my wisdom.  Now, this technique worked well for smaller children, but quic...

Any parent of teenagers realizes that these years are full of challenges, uncertainty, mood swings and balance.  Parents must be flexible, because the teens tend to fluctuate - often!  They want independence, freedom but they still need encouragement and direction.  It often takes a dose of humor to bring into balance the daily challenges of teens.  Their expectations and views and  your expectations often clash.  Here is a humorous list of rules I recently found that brings a balance of reality with humor in "Life Rules For Teenagers". Life Rules for Teenagers Rule No. 1 : Life is not fair. Get used to it. The average teenager uses the phrase "It's not fair" 8.6 times a day. You got it from your parents, who said it so often you decided they must be the most idealistic generation ever. When they started hearing it from their own kids, they realized Rule No. 1. Rule No. 2 : The real world won't care as much about your self-esteem as your school does. It...

Over At the Well today there is a fantastic post about Parenting While Thinking Ahead.   It is an encouragement to all parents to prepare their children and also themselves for the children to be independent one day.  There were some discussion ideas to ponder:   What do YOU do to prepare your kids for their future, and to prepare yourself for your kid’s growth into adulthood? How do you keep yourself from thinking of them merely as your kids or babies, but as separate people who will one day leave their father and mother (you) and cleave to a husband or wife? Isn't it amazing how fast time flies?  It seems like just yesterday I was holding a newborn son.  Then the busyness of life set in and my life turned into chasing a toddler, pre-school library trips while juggling a new baby, the beginning of school, sports activities, another baby and then out of nowhere that little guy is walking on a stage receiving his high school diploma.  WHERE did ...

The ministry of At the Well is growing and expanding their ministry.  One of the new ministries to encourage women is "Woman to Woman" which is a time for woman to ask questions and seek godly encouragement.  Tomorrow (Saturday) will be the first featured question/answer session and I have been asked to share about teenagers and independence!  Come on over At the Well tomorrow and let's share and encourage one another!

Ever feel like you don't understand your teen? With two teenagers, I am always on the lookout for materials to help this time of life. Maybe you are a new teen parent and just need some guidance how to handle this new territory. I've found a good and quick reading report. Download it here for free.

I read this today over at Blessed and thought it was hilarious. You see it is now Sunday afternoon, and there is a chore at our home which was supposed to be done yesterday by our teenagers, it is not yet done...the teenagers made a request to go somewhere, we said no...and quite a few of these exchanges went forth. If you have a teenager, you will love this. If you don't have a teenager yet, prepare your sense of humor, it will help you get through "challenging" times! Why? Because we said so. How come? Because we love you. Why are you and Dad so strict? We're sorry you feel that way. Why don't you trust me? It's not you we don't trust. Brittany is going, why can't I? We'd tell Brittany “no” too, if we were her parents. You don't want me to have fun. Yes, that's it . You don't care about me. You've found us out. Are you trying to make my life miserable? You've uncovered our dastardly plan! You and Dad aren't like other p...

Today's At the Well topic is about parenting. Sowing and Reaping in parenting. There is also an encouragement to share an anecdote or example of whole-hearted parenting. I love reading and learning about Christian parenting. Mainly because you can never get enough help as a parent! Knowledge is abundant, but wisdom is essential. It has been said that "wisdom is the ability to apply knowledge." The trick about parenting is that you learn as you go, you learn what does not work, from mistakes. Then, when you think you are headed in the right direction, a new child comes and everything that you figured out from the first child, does not work on the next child! Then you start over. Parenting is truly a challenge. We have entered a new phase as parents as we have two teenagers. There is a whole new set of challenges, rules, opportunities to let them grow and freedom for them to begin making their own choices. I struggle greatly with this new phase. Many times I ...

Teenagers reside at our home...so we are always in a state of "uncertainty". Meaning that as parents, we are new to this teenage thing, and the teenagers seem to change daily or hourly! There is no rhyme or reason to a teenager's attitude . This is a time of adjusting as we can range from hormonal flair ups followed by loving gestures and words in the space of 15 minutes! I've been reading, researching, praying and trying to figure out why they think and act so much different than they used to, but this phase is a growth period and is vital to who they are becoming. I found this description which fit teenagers pretty well. If you have teenagers, you can relate. Teenagers - the epidemic Most teenagers are a metamorphosis caught in the middle, like a worm transforming into a moth. They have lost the legs of youth, but haven't yet gained the wings of adulthood. Teenagers don't make sense or cents, but cost us dollars. They eat ravenously, sleep like i...

Like most other people, I had a few teenage rebellious episodes. These are things that I am not proud of and don't share much - preferring to share how God's grace changed those bad behaviors into a better way of life. But, last night I had a revisit of my teenage years. When I was a teenager, my mom was under a tremendous amount of stress. She was the sole bread winner in our family, dealing with husband issues and teenagers. Her way of dealing with us was if we behaved we could go out and do things, if not, we were on restriction. She didn't have the time or energy to deal or train teenagers ( I realize that now!). One time she let me go to a neighboring town with the provision that I find a ride home since it was too far for her to drive to pick me up. Well, I was having so much fun and we were at a families house, I just stayed the night - without calling her! I was really in a lot of trouble when I got home. Since I now have a 17 year old son, we are seeki...