Sunday, July 5, 2009

At the Well - Am I Showing Love?

Gathering At the Well

The discussion At the Well today centers around the question "Am I Showing Love?". Wow! This promises to be an interesting topic complete with a little soul searching! The first response that comes into my mind, is "yes", of course I show love!

The questions for today encourage us to dig a little deeper:

Are you showing love to your family, or are you finding yourself more and more often entertaining selfishness and self pity?

If you are entertaining your flesh, what can you do today to change that and make your home a place of love and contentment?

As women, we are usually responsible for most of the duties done in the home. The daily meeting of the needs of our families falls mainly to the wife/mother. After all, we cook most of the meals, clean up after the family, keep the house clean, do the laundry etc., etc., etc. If that doesn't show love, what does???!!!

Many times I do find myself entertaining selfish thoughts and self pity. Times like when a delicious meal is made and served and when it is over, it is me who goes to the kitchen sink to do the dishes while everyone else goes to recline in the living room. Self pity cries out that "I am the only one who does this...", etc.

I have also found that entertaining these selfish thoughts and self-pity breeds discontentment, irritability and hinders the flow of loving service in my home. It seems that the more I give in to these selfish thoughts, the less grace and love there is to give out. It reminds me of a passage found in Galatians 5:16 "I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh. 17 For the flesh lusts against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh; and these are contrary to one another, so that you do not do the things that you wish. 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law. 24 And those who are Christ’s have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. 25 If we live in the Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit. 26 Let us not become conceited, provoking one another, envying one another."

Keeping our heart fixed on God's Word is a sure way to walk in the Spirit and have the fruit of the Spirit flowing out of our lives. Cultivating a thankful heart chases away self pity. Focusing on the needs of others chases away selfishness.

When we view our family and our homes as ministry directly assigned to us by God, it changes our outlook. God placed each of us in each of our unique roles. Your home does not run like my home, but God has placed us where we are effective in ministering His grace and love to those He has given to us.

This may sound a bit different, but if it is an ongoing practice, can make a huge difference in our attitude toward serving at home. During the daily grind of chores, especially the difficult ones, reflect with thankfulness - "thank you God for the hardworking husband, for the healthy children, for the home You have given us", on the blessings. Use this time to change selfish thoughts into thoughts of praise. As our hearts are changed, God's love not only fills us with strength to do these tasks, it overflows into the lives of our family. We are blessed by meeting their needs. We can further our joy by going a notch above. Seek out things those around us really like. By going one stop further, by cooking a favorite meal, picking up a special treat or anything that shows we paid special attention to the needs or desires of another speaks volumes of love to them.

Learn what routines work and what causes tension in the home. It has been said that the woman controls the spiritual and emotional thermostat of the home. When Mama's heart is happy, the home is happy! Mama's heart is where true love, joy, contentment and peace create the home atmosphere.

A good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth good...Luke 6:45


  1. Thanks for the desserts (sorry I'm not really in sync with your post!) Yum Yum looks great - and blueberry crumb cake, too! and even banana pudding...and......


  2. O yes, you are so right about our family being our ministry - they are our first ministry! One day we will stand before God and give an account for these little people and the man he gave us. I long to hear him say "well done!"

    But in the thick of it, it is easy to turn our eyes onto ourselves. So much of our frustration stems from exhaustion - lack of getting enough rest, exercise and eating right. And also our lack of time with God alone. We need to take care of ourselves so we can bless our families!


  3. great point - I am so guilty of making a delish meal and end up getting upset if I'm not praised for it. I wasn't truly making the meal for them - I was looking for a pat on the back for me.
    have a great week -

  4. this is great.. thanks for sharing.. it has spoken to me!


Thank you for sharing your commment. It is a joy and blessing to hear from you and your words are appreciated.