Home, Home, Home!! The place we can let go, relax and just be ourselves. I love my home and enjoy just being here. Last week my heart was cut, stirred and then encouraged by one of my teenager's remarks. It was his night off work and he was lining up to go somewhere. I needed him to stay home for about an hour before he went. He moaned and groaned and finally said "It's my only night off, I don't want to spend it sitting around the house." OUCH that hurt! My first thought was to pray for the Lord to change HIS heart and that he will want to be home. But don't you just love it when God does answer the prayer, but changes YOUR heart?
Since our family includes 2 teenagers, I know it that we are on the brink of major household changes. They will be leaving our home soon as they begin the journey as adults. No matter how much I long for them to be near me, it is the divine plan for "man to leave his mother and father and cleave to his own wife" one day. It has been said that the only thing sadder than having a child leave home in their proper time, is to have one that will not leave. As they get closer to adulthood, the freedom to begin moving about on their own is natural. Making some of their own choices is a step towards Independence. So, my prayer changed, not to "make" him stay home more, but to put a special place in his heart for our home.
This also inspired me to evaluate and work on my home atmosphere. Why do we want to be home? A joyous home is filled with good things. Things like:
- Kindness
- Encouragement
- Joy
- Peace
- Fun Times
It may take some effort to overcome some qualities that seem to want to stay around such as:
- Bickering
- Critical Words
- Nagging
- Strife
- Smiling. It sets a beautiful tone for the home.
- Blessing the home through prayer, Scripture placed around the home, uplifting music.
- Scent. This is a wonderful thing to come home to, a good smelling home.
- Home Cooking. Who doesn't love to come home to a nice, hot, home cooked meal.
- Treats. Surprising the family with unexpected treats along and along.
- Fill our hearts with the love and grace of Jesus and pour it out in the home.
- Pray diligently for the home. While working in it, before entering, before leaving.
- Speak blessings out loud. Pray through the home the qualities and characteristics you want to see develop.
The time, effort and energy it takes to make a home is a worthwhile investment that brings a lifetime of beautiful rewards of joy as the essence of home is engraved on the hearts of our family.
Oh, thank you! This seriously hurt, but I needed it. I just got done scolding my kids for the state of their rooms and I'm feeling badly about it.
ReplyDeleteThank you for the reminder that my words and attitude make a difference in my home!
Blessings!
Beautiful post, my friend! I especially loved the last sentence. I want the essence of home to be engraved on the hearts of my family, too.
ReplyDeleteOur 22 year old loves to be busy, and when he is home from college he is gone, gone, gone (although he does try to squeeze in some family time now that he's moved away).
Before he moved away, however, he was like your son and pretty much wanted to be busy every single night.
Our 17 year old doesn't like being busy like that. He is pretty much a home-body and enjoys being home and doing his own thing.
Isn't it funny how their two personalities are so different?
I will miss my kids some day when they move out permanently, but you are right - I would not want them to be afraid to move out and be independent.
Thanks for linking up to Making Your Home Sing Monday!
Thank you for this beautiful post. I have two teens, a girl 19 and a boy 16. The girl is hardly ever here, between work, church and a courtship and boy, well, we have a ways to go with him. I have to remember that they will be gone all too soon. I want my home to be a peaceful place that they want to spend time in.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the inspiration to give my older kids good reasons to choose to enjoy being at home. It is always good to be reminded about the impact a mom has through her home.
ReplyDeleteBeautiful and very timely for me as well. With a 19 year old who really only sleeps and showers here, a 17 year old who will be off to college this coming fall - and a 14 year old 'who still loves us and wants his noggin rubbed' I need the reminder that - home needs to be an inviting and warm and loving place.
ReplyDeleteSince I work full time +, and my husbands hours are different everyday - (although bless his heart - he does the family laundry EVERY Saturday) I am exhausted and when I come home to a house where NOTHING has been picked up - even lights are left on - and if I ask for help I get an argument - it is easy to fly off the handle. My 19 year olds room is 2 feet high in clothes across the floor. You cannot even walk in there - Last week I threatened to take his car (that he owes us $1000 for and pays off each paycheck) -that did the trick - except he hauled all the clothes to the hall and then left them there for 5 days until I threatened again.
My mom always said "Kill 'em with kindness"
I know I must have gone wrong somewhere along the way - always picking up after them - although I always refused to clean their rooms (except maybe once a month).
I am going to pray about your suggestions - that God would plant them on my heart and give me the energy to make our home a place that is a place they want to be and they want to care for.
Thank you - your words touched me - today!
Having three that have "flown from the nest", I can say "Amen" wholeheartedly to your post. I think one of the things that blesses me most now is that they all still enjoy coming "home" and want to be here for holidays and such. Sometimes when they were growing up, they would spend the night at a friend's house. When they came home, they would talk about how things were different there.... not bad, just different. It did make me aware of adjustments we should make or of things that maybe we were doing right. Enjoyed our three as kids...enjoying them now as adults....God is good!!
ReplyDeleteI love this! Your words are so true, we do need to actually work on home atmosphere. I never have thought about "Smiling. It sets a beautiful tone for the home" but I agree with that as well :)
ReplyDeleteOh, I just that line...and that thought - creating a special place in their heart for home! Having Jordan here for three weeks, I hope that that special place feeling deepened...or, perhaps, grew as this house is new and just beginning to be home for all of us - and especially him. It was special having him but, you are correct, that it is a joy to watch them create their own independent lives...and homes (even if it is an Air Force dorm room - which he was quite proud of) :)
ReplyDeletePowerful post!! Happy Monday, friend.