Monday, March 11, 2013

Datng...God's Way - What to Look For

As a mom to three sons, once they hit the dating age, I began to keep a close eye on girls that drew their interest.  Little things would be noticed, the way they dressed, talked, carried themselves etc. For years my husband and I have prayed for all of our boys future spouses that they would be women of virtue, purity and good character.
During these rough teenage years, I often pray for those future spouses and their parents!!  The teenage years are not easy, but I'm thinking it is a lot more emotional and fragile when dealing with girls!
I've recently been thinking of the many girls who are out there seeking Mr. Right.  In our culture today, dating is best.  Hormones, the danger of discarding morals in today's culture, emotions, etc. make this time of life a challenge.  Without God's direction, relationships can spiral out of control, mistakes be made that cause lifelong pain and scars. The best way to avoid painful emotions, bad experiences, and regrets is to set high standards—God’s standards as presented in the Bible—for our behavior and for the type of guys being considered as serious possibilities. We need a measuring stick, and God has the perfect one right in His Word.

The book of Ruth offers great guidelines for what to look for in a potential romantic relationship (if marriage is God’s will for you). Look at the qualities highlighted in Boaz, the man Ruth is interested in:

Godly. Look for a guy with a passion for Jesus. This should be #1 on your list. Boaz asked God through prayer to bless Ruth (2:12).

Diligent. Look for a guy who’s a hard worker. Boaz was a careful manager of his property and wealth (2:1).

Friendly. Look for a guy who will be your best friend. Boaz gave a warm greeting and welcomed Ruth to his field (2:4,8).

Merciful. Look for a guy with compassion for others. Boaz asked about Ruth’s situation and acted on her behalf and in her best interest (2:7).

Encouraging. Look for a guy who contributes posi­tively to your growth (in spiritual matters, character development, educational and personal interests). Boaz pointed out Ruth’s strong qualities and spoke of them to encourage her (2:12).

Generous. Look for a guy with a giving heart. Ruth needed food and worked hard for it. Boaz saw that, appreciated it, and arranged for her to be given extra food (2:15).

Kind. Look for a guy with a kind heart. Boaz obvi­ously cared for Ruth’s well-being. He also cared for Ruth’s mother-in-law, Naomi. Naomi thanked God for Boaz’s kindness toward her and Ruth (2:20).

Discreet. Look for a guy who will protect your repu­tation. Ruth went to see Boaz in the evening, and he honored her purity and sent her home from the threshing floor before daylight (3:14).

Faithful. Look for a guy who keeps his word. Boaz followed through on his promise to marry Ruth (4:1).

Boaz sounds like a great guy, doesn’t he? Do you know anyone like him? If not, be patient. Guys like that are definitely out there!

As my sons will be seeking godly wives, I found the perfect quote which sums up all we desire in a daughter in law:
 "A woman's heart should be so hidden in God that a man has to seek Him just to find her."
~Max Lucado

1 comment:

  1. What a great list to be praying through! I always appreciate your wisdom.

    The sad reality is that sometimes, even after years of prayer on the parents part, a child will choose a mate that is not in accordance with Lord's best for their life. In that case, the advice of a godly older woman who experienced this shared her reaction, "I choose to love her."

    Then, this is the perfect list to pray for that unsuitable mate your child chose and ask the Lord to do the work. Thanks for the encouragement!


Thank you for sharing your commment. It is a joy and blessing to hear from you and your words are appreciated.