I'm a broken person. Don't be alarmed, nothing catastrophic happened recently, I'm healthy and happy, but realizing that so many things are out of my control.
The more mature and wiser I get (and older), the less control I have over things in my life. The days of being able to 'make' my children mind have long gone. They are growing into their own person, making their own choices...all without my constant guidance! My parenting mistakes glare at me and haunt me at times. I'm not a perfect parent!!
As a Christian for over 25 years, my knowledge has grown, but there are still areas that I don't like...attitudes, habits, ingrained actions...that seem to always be lurking deep inside my heart ready to come out. I'm not the perfect Christian!!
I am a very private person. Sharing good advice comes easy for me, but opening up to share weaknesses is a big struggle.
When regrets try to come in my mind and heart, I realize how far from perfect I am. Instead of allowing my weaknesses to overwhelm me, I turn my eyes on the Lord and to His grace. He knows (and how well!) that I can never be perfect. I am a sinner, broken by sin and the sinful nature every Christian battles. But His grace, can make some miraculous changes.
As a parent, He can take my mistakes and bring grace and life into my children's lives, His love covers a multitude of sins.
As a Christian, a steadfast heart, set on Him will flourish and not be set back by temptations or distractions.
Being broken allows for freedom from attempting to have it all together. We can connect to others more easily with transparency and truth. We can share one another's burdens by understanding and sharing about weaknesses and encourage one another through those weaknesses, God's strength shines through.
There is no shame in being broken. Proverbs tells us that there is honor in humility. Being broken is not being hopeless. It is the opposite...God takes our weaknesses and fills them with His strength. Being broken allows His grace to fill us, to spill out into the lives of others and most importantly, to allow Him to shine through us.
I'm not perfect and thank God for His love and grace that makes me complete in Him!
"We believe, that the work of regeneration, conversion, sanctification and faith, is not an act of man's free will and power, but of the mighty, efficacious and irresistible grace of God." Charles Spurgeon