Brotherly Love

Recently at a wedding of a lifelong friend of one of my sons, I chuckled to myself as the groom was standing in front of the church, waiting on his bride and his brother who was the best man came up the stairs to take his place and gave him the ''elbow bump'. All moms of sons understand this physical connection brothers give one another, the touch or nudge with a shoulder, elbow or any limb that can connect with the target!  

Having three sons, I now understand it is a sign of affection, it is how they express in action their brotherhood. But, when my boys were growing, they could not pass each other anywhere in the house without bumping, nudging or shouldering one another. If the receiver was not in a good mood, a lot more action came about!   This picture is one of my favorites as it was taken right after church. They were all dressed up, but still all boys!

The night of the wedding I was speaking of, my middle son was involved in an accident. His older brother immediately after hearing the news, traveled down a few hours from his where he now lives with his own home and family. When the circumstances count, brotherly love is one strong bond.  They will be there for one another. 

As Christians, the Bible encourages us to have a 'brotherly love'. The love that endures through daily irritations but can also become fierce in times of another's need. Here are a few Scriptures regarding brotherly love:
  

Romans 12:10 ESV
Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor.

Hebrews 13:1 ESV
Let brotherly love continue.

John 13:34 ESV
A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.

Hebrews 13:1-3 ESV
Let brotherly love continue.

1 John 4:11 ESV
Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.

A definition of this type of love is found at Wikipedia;  Brotherly love in the biblical sense is an extension of the natural affection associated with near kin, toward the greater community of fellow believers, that goes beyond the mere duty in Leviticus 19:18 to "love thy neighbour as thyself", and shows itself as "unfeigned love" from a "pure heart", that extends an unconditional hand of friendship that loves when not loved back, that gives without getting, and that ever looks for what is best in others.

What does this 'brotherly love' look like for the Christian?

1. Put Them First
"Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves." (Phil. 2:3)
Self-denial lives at the center of love. True love denies self and supports another. Putting others first should be more than an act of humility, but an act of affection. It's not that we think so little of ourselves, but that we feel so warmly toward our brothers and sisters in Christ that we are happy to lay aside our interests and preferences so that another may experience blessing.

2. Seek Their Good
"always seek to do good to one another" (1 Thess. 5:15)
Love does more than put someone else first. One's desires may be destructive, or their path may lead to danger. Love will seek their good, their betterment, their advancement. The questions we ask must be, "How can I personally help my brother do well?" "How can I serve my sister so that she prospers in faith and life?"

3. Listen to Them
"be quick to hear" (James 1:19)
Love listens. Just as God hears us when we call to him, so must we listen to others. We need to listen in order to gain understanding either of truth, or of the one speaking. Until we listen to another we are ill-equipped to know their needs and seek their good.

4. Include Them
"Show hospitality to one another without grumbling." (1 Pet. 4:9)
Hospitality is a welcoming of others into your life. Love includes; it draws near to others and invites them in. It will not dismiss people because they are different or difficult, but will pursue them and offer them a place at the table. Love looks around, sees the uninvolved or unknown, and extends a hand of welcome.

5. Encourage Them with the Gospel
"Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing." (1 Thess. 5:11)
Love doesn't flatter, but it does encourage. Biblical encouragement is a kind of preaching; a gospel word offered to those who need it. Love points people to Jesus Christ, in whom we see love in its brightest display. Those around you need to hear how the good news of Jesus' life, death, and resurrection, remains good news for them today. It's not just for the lost. It is for the found. For without it we drift back to false hopes, doubts, and fears.

6. Pray for Them
"pray for one another" (James 5:16)
If you love your brothers and sisters you will pray for them. It is sad that we so often quickly promise, "I'll pray for you!" only to walk away and never approach God on their behalf. Even sadder is that those who need the prayer are happy enough with the false promise. They appreciate the nice thought, and think it's better than nothing. But it's not. It's just nothing. Love prays. It seeks God's action in their lives. It pleads with God for greater grace on behalf of others. And to this God responds.

Showing that brotherly love can be a true challenge.  But as we seek to obey God and follow His commands, He can put a love for others in our hearts that we cannot muster up on our own. May our prayer be to love others as He does.  With this kind of love flowing, our world will be a better place.