Friday Funnies - Just For the Girls...

I recently received an email from a friend to share for today's Friday Funnies. It contains a few things that only the girls will understand!

PREGNANCY Question and Answer:

Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.

Q : I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q : What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth.

Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?

Q : My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q: When is the best time to get an epidural?
A: Right after you find out you're pregnant.

Q : Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.

Q : Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.

Q : Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.

"ESTROGEN ISSUES"

10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE "ESTROGEN ISSUES"
1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet.
3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
5. You 're using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says: "How's my driving-call 1- 800-".
6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
7. Everyone seems to have just landed here from "outer space."
9. You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.

Sometimes We Score, Sometimes We Block

Our family is in the midst of little league soccer season. My youngest son is playing and his enthusiasm is contagious. He is pretty good at the sport, but what makes it so great is that he loves it! He counts the days until the next game or practice. He loves his coach and teammates. He has moved up an age level this year and the players are working more like team, passing to each other and watching out for each other during play. During the last game, my son scored two goals, they were the only goals of the game. In today's game the team scored eight goals. My son came up afterwards to me and said, "I didn't score today, but I blocked". What a powerful truth those words can hold. In life, sometimes we score, sometimes we block. Sometimes we do great things, we excel, we achieve, we meet our goal - we score! There are also times we see the needs of others, sometimes they are sad or hurting, we block their hits. We look out for them so they can score. We

Relationships and Redemption

In every friendship or relationship, there is a common hope that they will grow and flourish. There is something inside of us that longs for a 'happy every after' story. We dream about it and work to make that happen. But in reality, relationships are a challenge. The bridging of values, lifestyles, interests and sacrificing for another are simply hard things to do! No matter how much we dream of the perfect fit, some relationships will not endure the stress. When differences appear and tensions arise, prayer can change situations, attitudes and ourselves. For the Christian, we know God can transform, change, heal. We cannot change others, but prayer opens us the door for God to step in and answer. God desires transformation, but does not demand it. The gift of free will allows us to choose to say Yes or No to Him. Romans 12:18 says, “If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.” Take notice of the first two words: “If possible …” This implies that some

A Blank Page - A Great Way to Fill It

A blank page - that is the first view of a new blog post. It has been a while since I have faced the blank page of my little blog! A blank page can bring a variety of emotions - emptiness, anxiety, pressure to perform or emotions such as inspiration, encouragement or simply bursting to share something. But there is always something fresh and exciting about the blank page of a New Year. Happy 2023! This is always a time in my life where inspiration and plans are formed and ready to be implemented for greater change. Aspirations may start strong, but alone do not make a difference. It takes consistency to create change. The changing or adding small habits is a key to great changes. A habit that has been beneficial in my life for many years is rising early. It began when the children were small and was the only pocket of time I had to myself. Through the years, mornings have become my favorite time of the day. Now that my husband and I are empty nesters, we go to bed early and rise early.

Joyfull Living

Search This Blog